Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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