Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
