Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
