I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
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