Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
