I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
