super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Everything about him screamed your future.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
