My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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