So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
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