I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Can you bring me the toilet please
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
You were trust falling into bushes
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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