C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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