She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
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