no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Randomize
