How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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