i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
