were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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