What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize