Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
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