sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Randomize
