I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
