she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Found your dick twin last night
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
