margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
