He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
