Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
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