How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
