Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
