sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
