bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Randomize
