Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I just gargled with NyQuil
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
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