They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
We had to coat check the pizza.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
