new low.... made out with someone while peeing
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
All the doctor said was why
Randomize
