I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
I think i peed on brittanys purse
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
