So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize
