I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
