There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
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