i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Randomize
