Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
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