Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
