He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
