And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
