420 ftw
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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