Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
