Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Randomize
