So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
splinters make it hard to masturbate
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize