have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
