PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Randomize
