the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Randomize
