I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize