Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize
