It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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