I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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