Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Randomize